i feel like always depressed and suicidal 2011 me.
wolf of wall-street is sucha good movie wow 😍
i hate everything i own idk what to wear to dinner today .-.
i feel really heavy.
I named you “June,”
for the month when I found out my delicate eggs were all cracked
on the inside of my womb,
and I would never bear a child.
Your father whispered softly, “I am so sorry,”
but did not understand when I cupped my belly
and apologized to the ghost of your embryo.
“Do not let your emptiness haunt us,” he told me,
but I could already see the sadness spilling out of the cracks
of your non-existent knucklebones. You were golden
and untraceable, but I could feel you shine
in the center of my sex, my ovaries curled up
like the edges of your fictitious smile.
We still made love without protection,
and I was sweet-talking baby cribs and stork wallpaper
for months until your father
packed his bags and left.
He could not stand my yawning yearning.
So I grew baby blue flowers on the kitchen sill
and sung you to sleep every night, waltzing my shattered
uterus around the cradle to the tune of June Baby,
“you’re a june baby, baby born in june,”
never once letting the notes crack like the hair-thin tubes
of my tangled infertility,
always tucking your fairy tale
Always kissing your ghost
my mom is the most basic bitch i know 😒
trying to feel optimistic but failing. i’d rather be at the beach than doing chores, the weather is so nice. i wish i had a car so i could go whenever i want.