today is the saddest of days
A white girl wore a bindi at Coachella. And, then my social media feeds went berserk. Hashtagging the term “cultural appropriation” follows the outrage and seems to justify it at the same time. Except that it doesn’t.
Cultural appropriation is the adoption of a specific part of one culture by another cultural group. As I (an Indian) sit here, eating my sushi dinner (Japanese) and drinking tea (Chinese), wearing denim jeans (American), and overhearing Brahm’s Lullaby (German) from the baby’s room, I can’t help but think what’s the big deal?
The big deal with cultural appropriation is when the new adoption is void of the significance that it was supposed to have — it strips the religious, historical and cultural context of something and makes it mass-marketable. That’s pretty offensive. The truth is, I wouldn’t be on this side of the debate if we were talking about Native American headdresses, or tattoos of Polynesian tribal iconography, Chinese characters or Celtic bands.
Why shouldn’t the bindi warrant the same kind of response as the other cultural symbols I’ve listed, you ask? Because most South Asians won’t be able to tell you the religious significance of a bindi. Of my informal survey of 50 Hindu women, not one could accurately explain it’s history, religious or spiritual significance. I had to Google it myself, and I’ve been wearing one since before I could walk.
We can’t accuse non-Hindus of turning the bindi into a fashion accessory with little religious meaning because, well, we’ve already done that. We did it long before Vanessa Hudgens in Coachella 2014, long before Selena Gomez at the MTV Awards in 2013, and even before Gwen Stefani in the mid-90s.
Indian statesman Rajan Zed justifies the opposing view as he explains, “[The bindi] is an auspicious religious and spiritual symbol… It is not meant to be thrown around loosely for seductive effects or as a fashion accessory…” If us Indians had preserved the sanctity and holiness of the bindi, Zed’s argument for cultural appropriation would have been airtight. But, the reality is, we haven’t.
The 5,000 year old tradition of adorning my forehead with kumkum just doesn’t seem to align with the current bindi collection in my dresser — the 10-pack, crystal-encrusted, multi-colored stick-on bindis that have been designed to perfectly compliment my outfit. I didn’t happen to pick up these modern-day bindis at a hyper-hipster spot near my new home in California. No. This lot was brought from the motherland itself.
And, that’s just it. Culture evolves. Indians appreciated the beauty of a bindi and brought it into the world of fashion several decades ago. The single red dot that once was, transformed into a multitude of colors and shapes embellished with all the glitz and glamor that is inherent in Bollywood. I don’t recall an uproar when Indian actress Madhuri Dixit’s bindi was no longer a traditional one. Hindus accepted the evolution of this cultural symbol then. And, as the bindi makes it’s way to the foreheads of non-South Asians, we should accept — even celebrate — the continued evolution of this cultural symbol. Not only has it managed to transcend religion and class in a sea of one-billion brown faces, it will now adorn the faces of many more races. And that’s nothing short of amazing.
So, you won’t find this Hindu posting a flaming tweet accusing a white girl of #culturalappropriation. I will say that I’m glad you find this aspect of my culture beautiful. I do too."
my emotions are getting so bad that when noelle asked me how i was doing yesterday, i nearly started crying on the spot. i hate everything. i don’t want to be alive because i feel skinless and everything hurts so bad.
askthemadhattter asked: i am in the same boat as you are with the liking other girls pictures thing. it seems that my boyfriend of a year likes other girls pictures more than mine. i feel guilty for getting mad and being controlling. so yeah, i totally understand where you're coming from girl
dude i feel exactly the same way. except i feel embarrassed to say anything because it seems so trivial. thank you for the message ♡
i get really sad and pensive sometimes. it’s silly to distrust him over petty shit like ‘liking’ a few pictures of some girl on instagram and then her looking through all my pictures and accidentally liking a really old one but i’ve been given so many reasons not to trust anyone that i can’t help it. but that kind of is like flirting if you like someone’s 10 week old selfies and that’s fucking fishy. i wouldn’t even do that.
sometimes i feel like i shouldn’t be in a relationship with anyone because no one seems worthy of my trust. im wary of his wandering eyes but it’s human nature, isn’t it? it’s not like i don’t check other people out. i hella do. i just don’t like relationships and i don’t know if i want to do this for the rest of my life. i don’t even really want to have a ‘rest of my life’ as a matter of fact. i don’t know what i want but i don’t want any of these bad feelings anymore. i keep telling myself to push away and disappear within my head but it’s difficult.
all the shit that’s happening with my parents again is making me really upset.
i’m sorry i never post. i just don’t want anyone to know how i really feel or how much i suffer
lindsey uses my tumblr just to look through my dashboard on her ipad